Drama Coursework – 9/11 Monologue Essay

The scene is set in the white-walled corridor of a hospital. Against the back wall is a white door, plain except for a small rectangular silver doorknob. The door is slightly to the left of the centre of the wall.

To the right of the door is a straight-backed chair. The corridor has a small rectangular window on the wall stage right. On the windowsill is a small vase of dying purple flowers. On the wall, there is a colourful drawing of a mother, father and daughter, done by a small child with crayons.

There is a sign with red lettering against the right of the wall up stage saying ‘EMERGENCY’.(Offstage) No Mum, I’m here (pause) They’re not telling me anything (pause) I’m fine, don’t worry about me (pause) I know I was there too, but (pause) she’s my daughter!!! (Pause) Yes, I’ll ring you as soon as I know anything more. (Pause) I’m just praying that nothing happens to her. (Pause) No Mum, there’s no point in you coming, you’ll never get let in. (Pause) I don’t know how she got there, but that doesn’t matter now, all that matters is that she’s okay.

.. (There is the sound of door opening and closing and footsteps approaching) Mum I’ve got to go; I can see a doctor coming. (Pause) Yes, yes, bye.(She walks onstage, entering from stage right, talking to someone offstage.

She is wearing a dirt streaked trousers and shirt ‘work type’ uniform. Her hair is dishevelled and her arm is bandaged. She has numerous minor cuts all over. The lights are dim and there is a frosty blue light focusing on her.

)Excuse me, excuse me, I’m her mother, please, can you tell me anything? How is she? (Pause) What do you mean you can’t say? I’m her mother! (Pause) Understand? (Pulls a disgusted face) Of course I don’t understand – my baby is dying in there, and you have the nerve to tell me, well to tell me nothing! (Pause) Well go then, if it’s so important!(She turns slightly, stamps her foot and throws her hands up in frustration)This is all her stupid fault! Why couldn’t she have just stayed at home where she belonged? Why couldn’t she have just…?(She stops pacing suddenly, and sinks into the chair)(Quietly) Who am I kidding?(She puts one hand on her heart)This is all my fault. It all is. My little angel came to my work because of my stupidity. I .

.. she doesn’t deserve this. (She puts her head back a little and closes her eyes for a few seconds) She doesn’t deserve me.I left my keys at home, and she had the kindness and the innocence to bring them to me, and I am blaming her? What does that make me? Oh God, please don’t let me lose her, not now, not like this.

(She stands up, and walks slowly while speaking)She is all I’ve got to live for, and no one else comes close.(Her voice becomes louder and informative, as though she was stating the facts of someone else’s life)She was born with muscular dystrophy, and the doctors…they said that she wouldn’t live past her third birthday.(She looks up at audience, chin raised, both voice and body defiant.)On that day, it felt like my world had been torn apart, but I still had my baby, an angel that had tumbled from heaven itself into my arms.

And her father was no use; he was nowhere to be seen. After calling me a cheap slut, he denied ever knowing me, before saying that he never wanted to see me again. So far, he’d gotten his wish.(She walks slowly towards the flowers, looking first at them, and then at the audience)Watching her grow up was the hardest thing I ever had to do.

Each second was one closer to the last, and each second was precious.(She walks upstage, and paces slowly)And she still loves me, but she doesn’t know any better. She doesn’t know what a failure I am.

Look… (She removes a necklace from around her neck) It says World’s Best Mum on the back. But what kind of a mother am I? What kind of a mother would kill their own daughter? It’s my fault, my fault that she is in there!!! (She turns around as though to sit down, but turns back sharply to the audience) What kind of a mother doesn’t even have the time to read to their child in the night? Or to spend time with her on a Saturday, or even to help her with her homework?(Whispers) What kind of a mother would kill their child?(She sits on the floor)My mum helps me as much as she can. She would give me the money if she had it, I know she would.

But she’s no better off than me since Dad died, so she helps me by looking after my baby when I’m working. I don’t know what I would have done without her. I’m a terrible mother. I work 6 days a week, 6 days, that means the only times I get to see her is in the night and on Sundays. I thought that if I saved enough money I could pay for the treatment that may one day save her.

And so I got another job, in the twin towers this time, it was just being a PA, but I’d take whatever I could get.Actually, it was me taking this job that’s caused this.(She walks slowly upstage. There is a soft sound of a telephone ringing)I…

I had forgotten my keys, so she came to my work to give them to me. I don’t know how she managed to get there, but she did. I was sorting through some papers for filing, when I saw her. At first, I was a little surprised, and then I was angry with her. I went to go and help her through the corridor. I never made it past the door.I could feel the ground shaking and I was terrified.

I just wanted to hold her and tell her everything’s going to be alright, like I used to. (Pause) But I couldn’t.I could hear nothing, and see nothing, but I could just feel myself screaming, screaming for my daughter that I knew I was about to lose.(She gets up and walks slowly towards the window, arms folded protectively.)And now, all I know is that my baby is in there,(She points at the door) dying, because of me.(She sits back down in the chair) Because of me.

(She gets back up again, and paces slowly. After a moment, she sits down on the floor)How could I have been so stupid?? I don’t care about anything else now except for my baby, but…

I mean, I can’t lose her, I just can’t. She’s all I’ve got left to live to for. I couldn’t live, for even a day without seeing her cute face and little dimples and I love everything about her.(There is the sound of a door opening and closing. She looks up as though in surprise, stage right, and stands up quickly, walking towards someone offstage.

The lights glow slightly purple.)(Quickly) Can you tell me something, please? Please, I’m her mother. (She pauses, her eyes filling with tears, as she puts one hand on her heart and takes a step back, a look of terror and shock on her face.) I..

.Are you…Is she.

..No.

.. (She shakes her head) No…No!(There is soft, slow violin music in the background.

She takes a few steps back, and falls over weakly. She looks up after a seconds pause, crying softly.) She’s dead. My…my baby’s dead.(She puts her head down again, sobbing softly, before the lights dim out completely to the scene ending.)

x

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