After reading “Why Chinese Mothers are Superior,” my first thought about Chinese mothers was why can’t western mothers have the mentality of a Chinese mother? It seems to me that, despite the fact that many Westerners believe that the Chinese mentality is harsh, Chinese children are more likely to succeed than Western children. Everything made sense to why Chinese students have graduated valedictorian from my high school for the past four years. On the other hand, another conclusion that I came to was that Chinese mothers are much too strict.
Although they want their child to succeed, I believe that they need to allow certain freedoms in order to encourage individualism. Upon that note, I believe that Chinese parents, even though they have a great mentality, are too strict. I saw many quotes which supported suggested that Chinese parents would do anything to make their child perform better academically. The first quote was, “What Chinese parents understand is that nothing is fun until you’re good at it. ” After I read this, I thought that this phrase glorifies the fact that Ms.
Chua believes that children should be forced to do something until they are good at it. Although school can be challenging, it does not mean that the student should simply give up on himself or herself. Getting straight A’s takes time. With time, the child will learn to grow within the subject and make it one of their strong points and eventually it will become fun for them. Another quote that supports my thought is, “… the child will resist; things are always hardest at the beginning… Tenacious practice, practice, practice is crucial for excellence.
While I agree with some parts of the mind of the Chinese mother, I also came to the conclusion that they were a bit too strict. I came to this conclusion immediately when I saw the list of things that they did not allow their children to participate in: sleepovers, school plays, play dates, extracurricular activities, ect. It clearly states that Chua did not let her children any sort of freedom when it can to social activties, I believe that for us to develop as an individual we need this freedom even if it monitored by our parents.
In my honest opinion, I believe that attending these events creates individualism which is essential to foster to a growing child. Also, when I read, “Chinese parents can order their kids to get straight A’s… Chinese parents can say, ‘You’re lazy. All your classmates are getting ahead of you,’ I thought, well, my parents do that too, but not to such a degree, and when they did try it I did not work as well as Chua says it did for her. It should be up to me, not them, to make myself number one.
This is the mentality I think that Chinese mothers should allow their children to have. I realize that my parents can make me stronger academically by making me study, but when college finally arrives, I always wondered if I would actually study on my own as much as I do when I am at home. Lastly, when I read, “Chinese parents believe their children owe them everything,” I had to re-read that sentence. I completely disagree with it because I believe that while children owe a lot to their parents they should not have to return all that was given to them, not completely at least.
To be honest, while re-reading my first two paragraphs I thought that if a Chinese student read this, they would disagree with me. I believe a potential problem that my conclusions portrayed is that they are under my perception. For example, when I stated that “practicing” to receive straight A’s is better than “forcing” them upon a child, a person who reads this sentence could completely disagree with my statement, because they may have not been raised to believe my theory. When it all comes down to it, it depends on the way we were raised, as the article implies.
However I must conclude that in my opinion Amy Chua is far too strict to her children, and while I agree with some of her points such as that western parents shouldn’t tip-toe around certain matters I strongly disagree with most of her other points such as the lack of freedom the gives to her daughters and forcing one to play the piano when she clearly does not want to, forcing a child to stay up all night to learn to play a song on the piano and not letting her get up even for water is too much in my opinion.